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Our Children Are Not Hefker
by Rabbi Yakov Horowitz
Reprinted from The Jewish Press

  Rated by 183 users   |   Viewed 80079 times since 3/2/11   |   158 Comments
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3/2/11

Our Children Are Not Hefker

One week ago on my website I announced my intention to attend the next court appearance of a man who was arrested last year and is now standing trial on 10 felony charges of child abuse.

I am attending the court proceeding to stand with and support victims he allegedly abused and to let them know they are valued members of our community.

I am doing so to send a loud and clear message to the predators who abuse our precious kinderlach: Our children are not hefker.

I am doing so to support the rule of law. Time and experience have proven beyond the shadow of a doubt that well-meaning, untrained people (like this writer) are powerless to protect children. Chazal (Avos 3:4) wisely stated that we must pray for the stability of our government for "if not for the fear it holds over its citizens [who commit crimes], a person would swallow his neighbor."

In my web post, I asked members of our community to please post supportive comments, which I would print out and deliver.

All week long, people wrote the most beautiful notes of support to the victim and his family members. As of this writing, more than 200 individuals from across North America, Europe, Eretz Yisrael - even Australia - posted comments and sent e-mails of support.

I strongly encourage readers to visit the website and join this effort. (Go to www.rabbihorowitz.com and look for the post with the title of this column). Let the family members know we love them, are terribly sorry they had to suffer this way, and will do everything in our power to see that those who abuse our children will be reported and prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.

I respectfully ask that you kindly sign your real name and your city of residence. We should be proud to do what the Torah instructs us to do - 36 times, no less, far more than any other mitzvah - to give comfort to the gerim (strangers) among us as they lack the support structure so vital to one's well-being. I can think of no greater "stranger" than the innocent children who have been ravaged by pedophiles.

When Yaakov Avinu criticized his children Shimon and Levi for killing the residents of Shechem after their sister Dina was violated by the son of Shechem's leader (Bereishis 34:31), he gave two reasons for his displeasure with the vigilante actions of his children: (1) they shamed the family and made them loathsome in the eyes of the neighboring nations and (2) they placed their family in life-threatening danger of an attack by the incensed people surrounding them.

Shimon and Levi responded to their father's critique with a four-word phrase: "Ha'chizonah ya'aseh es achoseinu? - Should our sister be treated like a harlot?" Rashi explains that they meant to say their sister is not "hefker" (lit. one who is abandoned), but rather has family members who are willing to lay their lives on the line for her.

At first glance, it seems Shimon and Levi gave an emotional response rather than a logical one, since they did not address either of the two concerns their father expressed. It is almost as if they acknowledged their entire family would be shamed and in grave danger as a result of their actions, but they asked Yaakov to take into account the mitigating circumstances and understand that theirs was a visceral reaction due to the situation at hand.

I would like to suggest an alternative understanding of their response to their father's rebuke. They may have been answering the critique point-by-point by explaining that if they allowed their sister to be treated as hefker, (1) a non-response to their sister's defilement would be a far greater shame to the family than the one they caused, and (2) the family would be in greater danger than before since the neighbors would assume that they could violate Yaakov's family members with nary a response.

Permit me to take a page from the response of Shimon and Levi and propose that our reluctance to squarely stand with abuse victims who report predators to the authorities, has sent a shameful and dangerous message - that we do not have the moxie to do what it takes to keep our children safe.

We are also sending a shameful and dangerous message when we sit by silently, while friends and family members of the alleged perpetrators harass the victim's family members for reporting the abuse to the authorities. That is why your notes of support for the victim's family are so very important.

Sitting on the sidelines and not supporting victims of abuse is not really a neutral position, for your silence only emboldens the perpetrators.

In his remarks upon accepting the 1986 Nobel Peace Prize, Elie Wiesel eloquently stated: "And that is why I swore never to be silent whenever and wherever human beings endure suffering and humiliation. We must take sides. Neutrality helps the oppressor, never the victim. Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented."

Each and every one of us has a sacred obligation to stand with the victims and with those who are oppressed. Again, we need to send a loud, clear and consistent message: Our children are not hefker.

Dear Readers:

If you have children, and you are concerned for their safety from the danger of abuse and molestation, as you certainly should be, may I suggest that you take the time to listen to the MP3 of a Project YES teleconference we conducted a few weeks back. The download is free, it is only 1/2 hour and it contains hands-on practical advice on how to speak to your kids about safety and personal space.

You can also read the "Safe and Secure" column by clicking on the link below. (Please note that this column was part 2 of a 3-essay series I ran in Mishpacha Magazine a few years back. "The Monster Inside" is #1 and "Human Problems" is #3 in that series.

I hope you find them helpful.

Yakov

Teleconference Recording - Safe and Secure; Keeping Your Children Protected from Pedophiles - audio file

Related articles:

Safe and Secure

The Monster Inside

Human Problems

Could This Possibly Be True?

L'maan Hashem, What Will it Take?

Olam Hafuch Ra’isi – A Topsy-Turvy World Gone Mad

Persecuting the Righteous and Protecting the Guilty

Deal With It – Becoming Part of the Solution

Radio Interview with Rabbi Yakov Horowitz



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1.     3/2/11 - 3:56 PM
Harry Maryles - Chicago Illinois - hmaryles@yahoo.com

Thank you for your courage. I will urge all of my readers to come over here and show their support.


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2. To the vicims     3/2/11 - 4:24 PM
Dorron Katzin - Chicago, IL - dakatzin@gmail.com

May Hashem send you the strength to be able to recover from what was done to you.

May Hashem send the rest of the community the wisdom to understand that you must have our support.


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3. support     3/2/11 - 4:31 PM
mark meyer appel - nyc

yasher koach rabbi horowitz

it is very important to attend these trials and show support....i have been flying in from Miami in all the court sessions chazak rabbi see you in court pleas post date of trial on your site mark meyer appel the voice of justice


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4. We must stand up for those abused     3/2/11 - 4:38 PM
Esti - New York

I am a reader of Rabbi Maryles' blog and I support your efforts.


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5. I do believe that more needs to be done to protect our children     3/2/11 - 4:44 PM
Bassie Gugenheim - Lakewood NJ

I feel for anyone who has been a victim of molestation. I hope that your efforts will bear fruit in helping to better protect our children.


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6. We stand with you     3/2/11 - 4:45 PM
Eliyahu Katz - Kew Gardens NY - ekatz@alum.mit.edu

Ha-shem should give you the strength to endure and overcome. You are not alone.


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7. B'Mukoim She'ein Anushim Hishtadel Liyois Ish!     3/2/11 - 4:47 PM
Pearl Engelman - Brooklyn NY

Rabbi Horowitz, Thank you, thank you and thank you again! For your courage, for your integrity in backing up your words with action, for your Ahavs Yisroel, and for understanding how alone and isolated, and Chutz L'Machane the victim and family are made to feel. We all (survivors, advocates) look forward to standing with you in the courtroom on March 25 i'yh.


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8. in show of support     3/2/11 - 5:13 PM
Needleman Family - Monsey NY - peshie@optonline.net

May Hashem send comfort and blessings to any victims. We are listening to you. We hear you. We support you. There are many people that feel pain in your suffering. Rabbi Horowitz- As always, we are proud to have our sons as your talmidim.


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9. "Elokim Yevakesh Es Hanirdaf" - Thank you for leading a Divine Effort     3/2/11 - 5:27 PM
Zev Jacobs - Sunnyvale, CA


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10. Kol Hakavod Rabbi Horowitz     3/2/11 - 5:30 PM
Zevi Ashkanazy - Chicago, IL


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11. Thank you Rabbi Horowitz     3/2/11 - 5:31 PM
Haim Dweck - Brooklyn, NY

We had about 15 people at the last hearing. Let's try and get at least 50 this time. The victim and his parents need everyone's moral support as they have been subjected to intimidation and harassment from their community. They will need our continued support as this case moves to trial. I spoke to the mother who is an eishes chayil and she will not give in to the pressure to drop this case or accept a plea bargain. Dascalowitz must be brought to justice once and for all for the sake of the safety of our children and to send a clear message to the child molesters out there that they will no longer be able to get away with committing these atrocities.


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12.     3/2/11 - 5:36 PM
Baylis - Waterbury CT

We stand behind and are with you. May Hashem give you bracha,peace of mind and happiness. Try not to forget that through it all, You are G-dly, strong and pure.


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13. It's not about me     3/2/11 - 5:45 PM
Yakov Horowitz - Monsey, NY - yhprojectyes@gmail.com

Dear Readers:

I am touched and encouraged by the number of comments and more than 12 emails that came within 30 minutes of this post.

I deeply appreciate those who are writing to support my efforts, but this is really not about me.

It is about the victims who are being abused again by people who are tormenting them -- in school and Shul.

Please address your posts and emails directly to the victim and his family so they should know that we are squarely with them.

Thanks.

Yakov


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14.     3/2/11 - 5:46 PM
Simcha Goldstein - Bergenfield, NJ

The Frum community supports you in standing up to these monsters.


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15. Doing the right thing     3/2/11 - 5:46 PM
Elliot Pasik - Long Beach, NY - efpasik@aol.com

Victims need to be supported, and every oppressor must be confronted, whatever religion he belongs to. You're doing the right thing. I was in court for the sentencing of Baruch Mordecai Lebowitz. It was a memorable experience. The victim's family appreciated the community's support.


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16. Thank you, Rabbi Horowitz!     3/2/11 - 5:53 PM
Bracha Goetz - Baltimore, Maryland - bgoetzster@gmail.com

May every victim of abuse be blessed to fully heal.


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17.     3/2/11 - 5:54 PM
Moshe - Rayvich - m_rayvich@yahoo.com

May HaShem heal the wounds of those affected - R'fuas HaNefesh and R'fuas HaGuf. You have our full support.


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18. YOU ARE NOT ALONE     3/2/11 - 5:55 PM
Pinny Taub - Brooklyn, NY - pinnyft@gmail.com

Family ....,

You are not alone. You should know you have many supporters. It’s not possible for everyone to come out to court or otherwise show support but there are many out there.

Hashem should give you the strength along the way. You should walk the streets with your head up high. You are an example to Klal Yisroel. No matter the outcome, you should always know that you did the right thing for standing up for your son and preventing further abuse on him and who knows how many others.

Reb Yankie, You are a Tzaddik

Pinny Taub


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19. May you have continued strength!     3/2/11 - 5:58 PM
Annette Pimentel - Brooklyn

It is so important to expose these predators for what they truly are.Thank you to the victims for showing such great strength by not keeping silent. May Hashem grant you continued strength and chizuk.


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20. Yasher Koiach Reb Yankel!     3/2/11 - 6:02 PM
Itzhak Schier - Dnepropetrovsk - ischier770@gmail.com

BS"D

I am no longer in the US and cannot join you, but I truly wish I could.


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21. Support     3/2/11 - 6:17 PM
Abbish Rand - Yerushalayim

We support you and back you in your efforts to have justice served. May your pain be eased and used for helping others.


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22. We Feel Your Pain     3/2/11 - 6:17 PM
Chaim - Passaic NJ

We feel for your family. You have many supporters - although you may not be aware of us. We are fighting a mighty battle against evil - the evil that flourishes "when good people remain silent". This is no longer the case. We state loud and clear that we back the victims of molestation. At the same time I think it is fitting to mention Joel Engelman - who stood alone in his ordeal. Joel, this one is for you too!


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23. We are with you!     3/2/11 - 6:47 PM
Ayelet Nadav

What happened to you should never have happened! Although we can never truly understand what you went through, know that we feel for you and care for you. You are one of us. Thank you for having the strength and courage to try to protect our community.


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24. Let pedophiles see that they won't get away with it     3/2/11 - 6:55 PM
Leah Rosenstein - Detroit

If enough people speak up and care to protect victims, it will hopefully deter some would be pedophiles.


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25. We support you     3/2/11 - 7:02 PM
Yocheved Turk - Monsey, NY

To the victims and their families:

We of the frum community have not shown nearly enough support for you over the past years - nay, decades. Now, finally, we are starting to understand and act on that understanding. We care about you. Until now, we have not known how to show that caring or how to help prevent others from going through what you have suffered. I sincerely hope that efforts like those of Rabbi Horowitz will bear fruit, and that we will be able to do what is right, and protect our children - and not shield their abusers.

Wishing you much strength and siyata d'shmaya in the difficult task of bringing these predators to justice.


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26. A true Tzadik!     3/2/11 - 7:13 PM
Mindy

Rabbi Horowitz: You are a true Tzadik for not being silent about this topic and for encouraging people to join this fight!!!!! This is perfect timing because all the Jewish blogs are being censored by the molester enablers and knowing that we actually have a true Tzadik come out and not only talk about it, but encourage others to join is so comforting to victims of abuse and their families.

Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!


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27. Support from Down Under     3/2/11 - 7:22 PM
Nosson - Australia - norbach@optusnet.com.au

Kol HaKavod Reb Yakov.

Your brave leadership on this issue, is truly an inspiration to both myself and my wife.

You are gathering the broken shards from the shattered Crown of the Torah, restoring it to its original beauty.

Chazak VeYamatz !!

Nosson and Michi Orbach - Melbourne Australia


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28. We are supporting you from accross the ocean.     3/2/11 - 7:46 PM
Nosson - Australia - norbach@optusnet.com.au

To the Family and those suffering.

We feel your anguish from a distance.

We wish you continued Koach in your pursuit for justice.

We know from Chazal that Hashem Yisborach is always with the Nirdof.

Chazak VeYaamatz!

Nosson and Michi Orbach - Australia


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29. time to stand up and be counted     3/2/11 - 8:15 PM
A Graeb - Woodmere, NY


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30. We Are With You     3/2/11 - 8:23 PM
Mordy Steinfeld - Far Rockaway, NY

To the victims, survivors and advocates, we are with you. We will not let this continue to happen to hundreds or thousands more.


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31.     3/2/11 - 8:29 PM
Mark Zagorin - Skokie IL

Refuah shleima! We are all with you.


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32. amen     3/2/11 - 8:33 PM
The Hedyot - daashedyot@gmail.com

Chazak v'ematz, Rabbi H.


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33.     3/2/11 - 8:37 PM
Shmuel Winiarz

May Hashem guide the victims and help them get past the horrible suffering they have endured. May the evil-doers be punished.


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34. Nazis     3/2/11 - 8:47 PM
Betzalel Avraham Feinstein - Baltimore

An adult who molests a child is no better than a Nazi. Such a person should be completely cutoff from our community.


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35. People like you make the difference!     3/2/11 - 8:50 PM
Hannah

If enough people come out in support of these terrible tragedies, these predators can be locked up forever.

Thank you for addressing this taboo topic and saying it like it is. The time has come for change! Victims voices will be heard.

Our communities need to be safe for everyone!


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36.     3/2/11 - 8:59 PM
Bella Tsibushkin

To victims and their families: please count me among your supporters. Your courage and perseverance deserve the deepest respect. May H-shem send you nechama for all the suffering you went through! To R. Horowitz: thank you for being a true Leader - the one who chooses to act out of convictions, not convenience or political considerations; and who encourages others to follow in the same path!


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37. We will no longer tolerate this in our community     3/2/11 - 9:00 PM
Ronny Biderman - Brooklyn, NY

For too long we have stood by while allegations such as these have been swept under the carpet. We have proven that our community cannot handle situations like this. You absolutely did the right thing by going to the police. We will not let you stand alone. You have my full support and I will join Rabbi Horowitz on March 25th to personally encourage you and show my support.


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38. You have our support!     3/2/11 - 9:24 PM
Abigail Roodyn - NY

There are many of us out here, follwing the reports, listening and supporting you. You are not alone you brave people!


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39.     3/2/11 - 9:52 PM
Rabbi Yitzchok Adlerstein - Los Angeles

Rabbi Horowitz deserves a yasher koach for his courage in protecting our children, and restoring the honor of our Torah. We should give him full support.


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40. Please know that we are with you now and always.     3/2/11 - 10:09 PM
Evelyn Weinberger - Brooklyn New York - LABRIUT18@YAHOO.COM

As a mentor for young Jewish teenagers, I see and also experience the visceral pain that many of our young ones face on a consistent basis.

Please know deep in your heart that Hashem has given you, numerous people whom you have never met, and whom you will probably never meet, who truly feel your pain, who suffer with you, and who care so very deeply for you. You are never alone. Hashem has been beside you even if perhaps you may have felt forsaken or forgotten. We cannot explain the suffering of such eminently worthy people as yourself or my parents who daily witnessed and experienced such suffering as survivors of the Holocaust. What you have experienced is your own Holocaust. I cannot explain why all of my grandparents as well as my husbands' grandparents were murdered with their families during the Holocaust. Never to have known, been loved or hugged by a bubby or a zaidy is something beyond any scope of the imagination. Yet this has become even more evident to me, as I have, thank G-D, been blessed with my own grandchildren.

My parents, two frum Jews, met and actually fell in love in hell, in a concentration camp [in Plasow, the location of Schindler's List]. Imagine that when they were sent on the long march towards the end of the war, and were forced to separate, my father vowed to find her if he survived. In spite of their pain they he found the will to find her, to search for her. Ultimately they found joy,beauty and gratitude.

You must know, that in spite of all your suffering,like my parents, Hashem has given you the ability to take life one hour at a time, and one day at a time. This is a huge gift from the heavens. He has given you the ability and many opportunities to smile, to laugh, to giggle, to smell the roses, and yes, to enjoy the good that there is right in front of you.

Please take the time to see and acknowledge the good that there is around you. Begin each day with a feeling of optimism that you shall overcome your pain. Try to surround yourself with good and worthy people and people that make you feel good and worthy [like Rav Horowitz!of Project YES}. You will see that very gradually, you will put your suffering aside and face the challenges that Hashem places before you, with a sense of joy and perhaps with a feeling of delight. I have seen this in my lifetime many times, and I have confidence that you can do this as well. I have experienced this in my upbringing by my beloved and blessed parents. We were Thank G-D, so fortunate and so blessed that they just celebrated their 65th Anniversary. So, no, I am not dreaming. It can be done. You can transform the pain into a future where you will eventually experience tranquility and a good sense of purpose. Project Yes is an organization that can help to get you on the road to give you that purpose. I strongly recommend that people support and stand behind the mentors and individuals who daily work to help fulfill your dreams and make them into reality. Eternally yours,

Evelyn{Fraiman]Weinberger


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41.     3/2/11 - 10:10 PM
Sruly Rosenberg - Brooklyn NY

Thank you for standing up to the monsters that unfortunately exist in our community. We are greatful for your bravery in confronting those who inflict such horrible suffering on our sweet innocent children. May every day that passes bring strength to you and your families.


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42. Community Support for Victim Fosters Healing     3/2/11 - 10:10 PM
Rabbi Aryeh Goetz - Baltimore, MD - aryehgoetz@gmail.com

My prayer is that with the support of the community the victim and their family will gain the courage and strength to heal from this trauma. Sexual abuse is "pogeai b'yesod" which means it destroys the capacity for a trusting relationship, but this can be restored with therapy and support, knowing the perpetrator is found guilty in public and has legal consequences.


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43. You are not alone     3/2/11 - 10:21 PM
Shira Steinfeld - Far Rockaway, NY

To any victim out there: You are not alone. Whether you find justice or not in this world for what has happened to you - there will be justice in the world to come. No oppressor or molester will be able "to get away" with hurting you, defiling you, or taking advantage of you. We are all here to support you. Hold on to that and don't let go.


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44. A Complete Refuah and Din     3/2/11 - 10:31 PM
Howard Reznick, LCSW - Baltimore, MD - howrez@gmail.com

My wishes for the complete Refuas Hanefesh and Refuas Haguf of the many victims, and justice done as regards the perpetrators of child abuse.

Kol Hakavod to all who are bringing clarity to this hidden issue, like the good Rabbi and all the members and the agencies of the Shofar Coalition in Baltimore.

Howard Reznick, LCSW-C


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45. We are with you!     3/2/11 - 10:44 PM
Leah - Glaser - glaser613@bezeqint.net

Precious Kinderlach (of all ages!) My heart aches thinking about the Gehinnom that you've been through. I wish we could have known; I wish we could have protected you. I hope the love that surrounds you and supports you (including from "strangers" like me) gives you and your families the strength to carry on, to heal, and to bring justice to the world. May this evil never happen again and may you all be blessed to emerge from this as greater human beings, who will most certainly be committed to making this world a safer place. Our hearts are with you!


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46.     3/2/11 - 10:50 PM
Mindi Zissman - Chicago

May Hashem give you the strength to continue to stand up for yourself, to see the value in your wonderful life and to realize that we are all behind you supporting you every step of the way.

Thank you for being who you are and for standing up for what is right. May your strength through this process give strength to those who have yet to come forward and speak up for themselves.

We are with you...


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47. Chazak     3/2/11 - 10:56 PM
Meir Weingarten - Brooklyn, NY

All our nevi'im warned time & again that we need to stand up for those who are victims, those who are weak, those who get bullied.

(Ed.- Could not read font. If this was a Hebrew quote, better to transliterate)

G-d hears your cries & he feels your hurt. Hopefully, we will learn to walk in G-d's ways.


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48. Thank you Rabbi     3/2/11 - 11:27 PM
Ludwig (Leo) Weingarten

Thank you Rabbi Horowitz, as a victim of molestation I appreciate courage and taking a stand. Thank you again


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49. To The Victims of this Predator:     3/2/11 - 11:28 PM
Bernard Horowitz - Bronx/NY

I stand with you and applaud your courage and the courage of your families in standing up to the monster who poses as a religious man; and in standing up to his supporters in the frum community who refuse to recognize the horrors perpetrated against you; and in standing up to the leaders of his community who shield and protect him instead of exercising their responsibility as leaders.


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50. I AM A SURVIVOR OF SEXUAL ABUSE BY AN ORTHODOX RABBI AND HIS FRIEND     3/2/11 - 11:32 PM
MURRAY LEVIN - BALTIMORE, MD - murraylevinphoto@yahoo.com

I INVITE ALL OF YOU TO GOOGLE: "JEWISH TIMES SEXUAL MOLESTION" AND YOU CAN READ TRUE, REAL, FACTUAL INFORMATION ABOUT A PROMINENT RABBI FROM BALTIMORE, A FRIEND OF HIS, AND ONE OF HIS SONS FROM BALTIMORE WHO SEXUALLY MOLESTED MANY OF US OVER THE PAST SEVERAL DECADES, GIRLS AND BOYS. I WAS TOO ASHAMED TO TALK ABOUT THIS UNTIL I REALIZED THAT SOME OTHER VICTIMS OF THIS CRIME COMMITTED SUICIDE. EDUCATING OUR YOUNG CHILDREN, 3 YEARS AND OLDER, ABOUT HOW TO PROTECT THEMSELVES AGAINST SEXUAL PREDATORS IS ONE MAJOR SOLUTION TO THIS STILL EXISTING ANCIENT PROBLEM. AND STATING THE NAMES OF KNOWN SEXUAL PREDITORS TO THE JUSTICE DEPARTMENT 0F YOUR LOCAL MUNICIPALITY AT THIS MOMENT IS A VITAL REQUIREMENT TO ENDING THIS INSIDOUS CRIMINAL ACT AND SAVING THE LIVES OF OUR CHILDREN. REHABILITATION OF A SEXUAL PREDATOR IS POSSIBLE, BUT UNFORTUNATELY NOT VERY SUCCESSFUL. WITH LOVE AND CARING, MURRAY


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51. Thank You     3/3/11 - 12:04 AM
Avi Dobin - Baltimore, Maryland

Because you came forward, you raised our awareness.

Because you came forward, more and more of our kids are being trained in how to detect and avoid the horror you went through.

Thank you for your courage!


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52. yirat shamayim     3/3/11 - 12:17 AM
Ronna - Moberly, MO - ronbonboo@gmail.com

when most people are asked what makes a frum person frum they make a list that looks similar to this: -shabbat -kashrut -tzniut -taharat hamishpacha

when i define frum i start with "YIRAT SHAMAYIM" and then the ussuals and i also include a person trying to better themselves whether it be going to shiurim, college, working for a higher position at work etc...

so to all the victims out there- i am 1 of you and i understand how hard it is to be abused and then havta be all of whats been listed bc of society... but you are breaking away from the box society has put u in. u r saying to all those who protect the guilty - YOU ARE NOT A RABBI, I DONT CARE HOW MUCH TORAH YOU THINK YOU KNOW YOU DONT KNOW ABOUT THE LAWS "DINA MA'ALCHUT DINA" meaning you have to report it, and that if you were so mesirat nefesh- you wouldnt be able to go on living letting that info collect in ur brain...

so stand up!!! be strong!!! and fight the fight that we are not all able to fight!!!!!!!!!


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53. Chazak! Stand Tall     3/3/11 - 2:28 AM
Fishel Bresler - Providence, RI - fishelbresler@gmail.com

Be strong, and know that thousands of people are with you in spirit. To pursue the abusers is to be attacked all over again; it is painful and difficult. Yet it is the beginning of healing for the whole Jewish people. Thank you, and may HaShem send you strength and nechoma.


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54. You are doing a good thing.     3/3/11 - 3:23 AM
Anonymous

To the children who are testifying: When I was young I was molested by a "Rabbi" who befriended me. At the time, I didn't understand what was going on and I never told anyone about it. He was my friend and I didn't want anyone to think badly about him. Many years - and many victims - later, I found out that this man was finally caught and brought to justice. Had I done what you are doing, I could have prevented him from causing pain and suffering to many others. Kol hakavod to you! Soon this will all be over. You will live normal, happy lives like everyone else. Believe me - I am proof. People face difficulties in life that sometimes seem overwhelming, but those feelings go away. You have great support and you will be just fine.


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55. With Support and Love     3/3/11 - 3:53 AM
Mermelstein Family - Beitar Illit, Israel

We support you and love you, our brothers who have suffered. IY"H justice will be served and you will go on to pick up the pieces and build beautiful lives for yourselves.


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56. We are with you     3/3/11 - 4:56 AM
Shaul Behr - Beit Shemesh, Israel

Thank you Rabbi Horowitz, for this initiative. To the victims: may Hashem bless you with the strength to overcome your trauma.


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57. May you find peace, may you prosper     3/3/11 - 5:20 AM
David Fass - New York

My hope is that justice will be done, and that you will be able to move past this trauma to live whole and rewarding lives. Our sages have taught that even suffering has a purpose, and I hope that you will be able ultimately to elevate your suffering into something genuinely positive, a heightened capacity to empathize with the suffering of others, and an ability to help others in need with a depth of understanding that is uniquely grounded in your own experience. May your good deeds bring a blessing on us all.


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58. You are our shluchim     3/3/11 - 6:58 AM
Shulim Goldring - Brooklyn, New York - shulimg@gmail.com

To all those who picked up the courage to expose the abuse they were put through, thank you. Because of you, this community will now be safer for children to grow up in. It takes tremendous courage to take up this fight. Yet, you are resisting the abusers and those who harbor them and doing the right thing. Because you broke the silence, my children will have the opportunity you were never given: to grow up in a community where evil people are afraid to show their faces.

The Jewish community owes you a tremendous debt. Hopefully, your reward will be to see a community that is safe for children and dangerous for predators, not the other way around.


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59. Klal Yisroel's heart is with you!     3/3/11 - 9:02 AM
Chava Abramovitz - Monsey, NY

My heart breaks in two every single time (and there are so many) that I hear of the suffering you experienced. There is no pain greater than what you've gone through, yet also no life sweeter than what Hashem has in store for you. From the depths of your pain, I pray for you that you work hard and struggle to heal, and emerge an amazing person on the other side.

There have been some beautiful letters on this blog to you- take them all in and know the koach that is pouring forth for you and all the kids who have suffered (and will be helped by your coming forward and not giving up) is very real and tangible and will stand with you and support you as you heal, for as long as you need us. You're a precious child of Hashem, and I hope you allow yourself to trust that He has a wonderful, amazing life prepared for you.

I hope to be able to attend the hearings - this is the first time I have heard about the possibility of doing so. Molestation is a topic that I feel very strongly that our community needs to get our act together on, and I'm very happy for the opportunity to be involved in this small way.

I hope you will be a starting point for many others of us to actively pursue taking REAL action against those who are destroying Klal Yisroel! May you be blessed with healing, simcha, sholom, ahava for yourself and others, and a life filled with meaning and purpose, bringing Hashem and all of us nachas.

Chava Abramovitz, Monsey


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60. We gladly support your efforts.     3/3/11 - 9:13 AM
Simcha Kossman - Baltimore, MD

May you continue to have the courage to do what's right, whether or not doing the right thing is popular. May Hashem help and comfort all the victims.


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61. Stand firm and justice will prevail     3/3/11 - 9:22 AM
Cindy Wodinsky - Cedarhurst, NY

To the victim and the family: You have all true members of "klal Yisrael" behind you. Do not allow yourself to be swayed by the perverted sense of justice of the community leaders who wish to silence you.

The person who did this to you was a selfish, twisted monster and thanks to your efforts will hopefully be placed where he can no longer harm innocent children. He and other "wolves in sheep's clothing" must know that they will all eventually be discovered and their actions will not go unpunished. There will, I'YH, come a day when you can put this behind you and enjoy life as it was meant to be. You have my support!


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62. A Rabbi with morals- a singular pleasure!     3/3/11 - 9:37 AM
Yossi Ginzberg - New York City - jgbiz120@yahoo.com

Thank you, Rabbi Horowitz for being that rare creature, a man who puts morality and doing the right thing ahead of personal gain.

You are the "Ish" of "B'makom sh'ein Ish". May Hashem give you the strength to always stand up for what is right.


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63.     3/3/11 - 10:00 AM
Yanky Adler - KGH

Thank you for your continued efforts to support those who have been harmed, and to prevent others from being harmed.

Yanky


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64. Yasher Koach Rav Horowitz!!     3/3/11 - 10:05 AM
Shloimie Kreindler - Baltimore, MD

To all victims: may HKB"H Who is the AV Harachamim be michazeik all of you and heal you!

To Rav Horowitz: you have always stood up for yashrus, and show love for every yid, regardless of their matzav. May HKB"H Bentch your efforts bichol inyanim!


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65. We support you! May Hashem heal and comfort you!     3/3/11 - 10:10 AM
Roni Kaplan - Teaneck, NJ - photon1701d@gmail.com


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66. Chizku v'imtsu     3/3/11 - 10:21 AM
Maury Kelman - NY

Dear Family, You are true giborim for standing up for your child, especially in light of a bizarre, anti-Torah sentiment which protects evil in the posture of religiosity and ignorant claims of mesirah. Please remember that emet always win, and that all normal Jews stand with you in your struggle against not only the alleged wickedness of this individual, but those who are trying to silence you. We all raise our voices with you, and stand with you in this fight against evil.


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67. Agree 100%     3/3/11 - 10:32 AM
Yehudis Goldsobel - London, UK

Well said Rabbi Horowitz.

I support those victims who have the strength to stand up in court amongst all this conflict.


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68.     3/3/11 - 10:35 AM
Feige Koegel - Wesley Hills, NY

May you find the strength to overcome the horrible injustice done to you. We stand with you and support you.


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69. Both G-d and the Jewish people are watching     3/3/11 - 10:40 AM
Elliot Pasik - Long Beach, NY - efpasik@aol.com

I should mention that at the sentencing of Baruch Mordecai Lebowitz, Rabbi Nuchem Rosenberg and Rabbi Gershon Tannenbaum were present, giving chizuk to the victim. We need more rabbis like these. G-d and the Jewish people are watching.


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70.     3/3/11 - 10:44 AM
Tzvi Grossman - Sharon, MA

Thank you for having the courage to do what is right.


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71. Thank You Rabbi Horowitz     3/3/11 - 10:46 AM
Zvi Gluck - Flushing, NY - zgluck@gmail.com

Thank you for being brave and doing the right thing. I have been speaking about this topic publicly and have been met with tremendous resistance, and with people like Rabbi Horowitz, perhaps the world will see what is out there, so we can protect our children and support those that have been hurt.

The cover ups must end, and we must do the right thing. Rabbi Horowitz, I hope and pray that others do the same as you, and quickly.

Zvi Gluck, Flushing NY.


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72.     3/3/11 - 11:01 AM
sury neuman

thank you!


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73. Thanks for Being an Inspiration to us All!     3/3/11 - 11:20 AM
C Freifeld - Lakewood

Rabbi Horowitz you are an inspiration to so many people. You have done so much for the frum community in the last decade (and more). You have brought so many controversial issues to the forefront and have faced oppostion and adversity with such honor and commitment. I, as a mother am so thankful that there is someone like you in our midst. You are fighting for the children, our children to insure a better world for them all. To the victims and families my thoughts and prayers are with you. May you have the strength to beat the odds and show the sick twisted perpatrators of evil they will NOT win. May Hashem bless us all with a Safe Happy Blesssed future.


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74. My support     3/3/11 - 11:22 AM
NL - Lakewood, NJ

I fully support this effort.


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75. Yasher Koach     3/3/11 - 11:33 AM
Esther Chanie Dushinsky - Monsey, NY

Yasher Koach to those who are active in protecting and standing up for victims of molestation. May G-d give you the strength to see this through and find peace.

Thank you


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76. Full Support     3/3/11 - 11:46 AM
Reuven Abedon - Baltimore, MD

So much suffering can be minimized when we get activated. All victims have my complete support. All are free to email me if I can help in some way.

Chazak v'nischazaik


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77. I stand with you in your efforts     3/3/11 - 11:56 AM
Eliezer - Toronto

May Hashem grant you the strength to stand up to the forces attempting to prevent this evil from being eradicated from our community.

Yasher koach for helping make our community a safer place for our children.


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78.     3/3/11 - 12:35 PM
Eli Greenwald - Brooklyn, NY

I would like to express my support for the young victim and his family. The community cannot allow them to be victimized again and must show up in court. I will plan on attending the court proceedings and hope that many sane thinking people in our community will do the same. You are not alone and I hope you will be encouraged to know that in this difficult moment, there are people out there who really do care about you.


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79. Chazak V'ametz     3/3/11 - 12:41 PM
Faige Loeb - Baltimore, MD

To the courageous victims and their families:

Please know you are not alone. While I and so many others cannot be in court with you on that day, our thoughts, prayers and broken hearts are with you in your pain, and fully support you in your battle. ki yode'ah Hashem derech tzaddikim v'derech risha'im to'ved. May you only know peace, sheltered in Hashem's loving embrace.


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80. Sending support     3/3/11 - 12:46 PM
Rivka Iacullo - Atlanta, GA

To all who are testifying and all who stand with them: Thank you for your courage, and for doing the right thing.


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81. In Support Of All Molestation Victims...     3/3/11 - 12:47 PM
Malky - Montreal QC

Thank you Rabbi Horowitz! I support and applaud your efforts and wish you continued hatzlocha.

To all the victims out there.... Hashem should heal you and guide you on the road of health and happiness. We support you and stand with you in your pain. You are not alone. You are in my tefillas.


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82. I am in full support of you     3/3/11 - 1:01 PM
Devorah - Brooklyn

I think this is extremely important - to bring this issue to the forefront and speak about it in the open. The silence is what hurts these victims most. They go through so much pain and it is special to see the letter you wrote, with such warmth and love - in support of these victims.

Thank you!


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83. AT LAST, we have the courage to STOP THE ABUSE OF OUR KIDS     3/3/11 - 1:22 PM
Leah Russell - Brooklyn, New York

Abusing our children MUST stop NOW! "Let them know that we love them, that we are terribly sorry that they had to suffer this way, and that we will do everything in our power to see that those who abuse our children will be reported and prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law."


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84. ... & thank you     3/3/11 - 1:46 PM
benjy cohen - jerusalem

chazak v'ematz!! we not only regret your terrible suffering & support you, we - the entire community -also must THANK YOU so much. because bs"d through your doings, we [all of our children]will be a step closer to being protected from such [potential] pedophiles in the future.


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85. Support     3/3/11 - 1:55 PM
Rachel Horan - Ramat Bet Shemesh, Israel

Shalom, I am writing to express my support to the victims of these acts. We stand with you. May you be blessed with happiness, health and all the brachos.


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86. May Hashem be with you     3/3/11 - 2:29 PM
Leah - Brooklyn, NY

To all those who have suffered the pain and degradation of molestation, may Hashem grant you peace and blessings all the days of your life. I am truly sorry for all that you've been through.

It is time that we, as a community, stand up and shout, "We will not tolerate these monsters any longer!"

To the families of these victims, please know that even though I cannot be in the courtroom on March 25, I will be with you in my thoughts and prayers.

Thank you for standing up for what is right, and not bowing to pressure.

Once again, may Hashem grant you and your families the strength and the will to continue to fight & to heal.


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87. I stand with you all     3/3/11 - 2:35 PM
Ariella Levin - Baltimore, Maryland - levin.amelia@gmail.com

My heart and soul stand with you. Your courage is awesome. May Hashem bless you with strength and a complete healing.


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88. Even a Frum pedophile should go to prison.     3/3/11 - 3:14 PM
Jeffrey Wallach, LCSW-R - Brooklyn, New York - jeffrey.wallach@nychhc.org

The only way to protect our children is to turn pedophiles to the authorities. Who are we more worried about? - the children or their abusers?


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89. We're with you!     3/3/11 - 3:17 PM
Frumi Jankelovits - Brooklyn NY

BH Rabbi Horowitz is taking a stand. I personally know a few victims of molestation as children so it means a lot to me that this issue is finally being brought to the forefront... to all victims, just know that we are with you and davening for you, and because this is being publicized, it will iy"h prevent this from happening to any more of our precious children. We all daven for all of you that you should have a complete recovery, and be able to overcome the pain and live happy lives!!


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90.     3/3/11 - 5:04 PM
Akiva - Brooklyn, NY

We salute your efforts!!


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91. Thank you for speaking up about abuse     3/3/11 - 5:07 PM
Chaya Rochel Michelson - Brooklyn, NY

Thank you, Rabbi Horowitz, for all you do. I personally know someone who was harmed by molestation, and she needs all the support she can get.


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92. Thank You!     3/3/11 - 6:33 PM
Chaya Einhorn - Brooklyn - chayamom@yahoo.com

Kudos for the courage you and your family have in coming forward and facing the evil so that hopefully we can put an end to children being hurt in the future. As a parent, molestation by those who we entrust our children to, is one of the scariest nightmares. To come forward and try to put one of these monsters far away from children is a tremendous chesed.

May Hash-m heal your pain and give you the koach to go through with the difficulties involved in your life. May you and your family see much hatzlacha and siyata d'shmaya.

To Rabbi Horowitz; thank you for speaking up despite all the deniers out there. Our children are being hurt and they and their families need the support you offer.


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93.     3/3/11 - 7:21 PM
Frada Pasik - Long Beach - fradalb@aol.com

May you find comfort and strength to rebuild your lives and recover from the abuse you endured.Your voices will now be heard because so many of us are now listening.Thanks to Rabbi Horowitz,a true Tzaddik,I think there is so much more hope for victims to recover and for molesters to be put away.


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94. kol hakavod     3/3/11 - 8:54 PM
sara lebov - brooklyn ny - saralebov@gmail.com

Thank you Rabbi Horowitz for standing up for the victims.

And to the victims my heart goes out to u and ur family! I was fortunate enough to make it to last court hearing and hope to b there IY"H again on march 25! U have really inspired me and a truly hope that justice will be served! Keep up your good work and stay strong!


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95. Thank you!     3/3/11 - 9:27 PM
Naomi Grossman - Sharon, MA


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96. May G-d bless you with success and courage     3/3/11 - 9:58 PM
Chana - Jerusalem


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97.     3/3/11 - 10:53 PM
E.F. - Brooklyn, NY

Dearest Victims and Families, You are the bravest among all of us! Exposing this unacceptable behavior in our midst, as painful as it is for you, is a selfless act of chessed that will save many other precious neshamos. We support you wholeheartedly in your Avodah for the Klal. Chizku V'Imtzu


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98. Thank You!     3/4/11 - 12:44 AM
Leiby Burnham - Oak Park, MI

Thank you for having the courage to stand up for what is right. May Ha-shem give you the koach to keep on with your wonderful work!

Leiby


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99. Kol HaKavod     3/4/11 - 12:58 AM
Gila Weiss - Jerusalem

I cannot begin to imagine how much courage it must take to stand up to your abusers and to the community that would protect them and not the abused. I am truly humbled.

My prayers--and a huge amount of respect--are with you. Stay strong and know that there are plenty of us who look upon you as a hero, not for being abused, but for having the strength and the courage to fight for justice whatever the cost. You deserve justice. May Hashem bless your efforts and support you in this.


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100.     3/4/11 - 1:02 AM
Nathen - Brooklyn

By taking huge personal risk and fighting for justice in a difficult environment you are making our children safer and we all owe you for that. We fully support you and appreciate your courage.


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101. Hatzlacha     3/4/11 - 9:54 AM
Asher Lipner, Ph.D.

To the family of the victim of Daskalowitz,

Hashem should reward your efforts with success and with healing. You are heroes of the Jewish people. Like Shimon and Levi who showed true love and compassion for their sister Dina who was raped, by prosecuting and holding accountable the molester, and by standing up to the community that supports him, you are proving that we can and will keep Jewish children safe.

To Rabbi Horowitz and all the commenters here:

Psychological studies show that for victims of sexual trauma, confronting their abusers in court can sometimes, but not always be healing. What I found fascinating and hope you do too, is that the key "variable" that most predicted whether the prosecution reduced symptoms, was NOT whether they won or lost the prosecution. What most determined how they felt about it was how much support in their community they received.

If victims feel they are not alone but are supported and thanked for their efforts, then even if they do not succeed they feel better. But if the community stands with the molester and scorns the victim, then even if the perp is convicted and jailed for life, the victim feels a hollow victory and does not get healing.

Based on this research and what I have seen here on this site, I would say that we have already won.


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102. Thank you for your courage, be strong     3/4/11 - 10:08 AM
SEB - Zurich, Switzerland

Thank you for having had the courage to come out and report the crime to the police. Be strong during trial. I know it is not easy, but we are all here to support you. Either in the court room or from far away.


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103. May Hashem give you comfort     3/4/11 - 11:40 AM
Aharon Kahn - NY

Chazak chazak to all of you. As scary and as intimidating as this legal process may seem, remember that Hashem is with you.


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104. support     3/4/11 - 12:55 PM
Anonymous

Indeed we must come out in the masses to stop the epidemic from being swept under the rug. we must empower our leaders and the judicial system to help keep us safe as mandated by our holy torah


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105. Al Tiru- Do Not Fear!     3/4/11 - 1:09 PM
Yerachmiel Lopin

Over a year ago I wrote drashah as part of a story about those who have the courage to bring molesters to justice. I had people like you in mind when I had a Rabbi Besdin say:

Al Tiru, do not be afraid. It says in the torah that Amalek attacked achrechah (which some read as from behind) but chassidim also read it as those we left behind. That is, we rushed and didn’t pay attention to those who were weaker and slower. Only because of that was Amalek able to attack them. But if we always make sure we are with those who are weak, if we leave no one behind, amalek will not succeed in attacking any of us.

Chazak, we are with you and my wishes for a complete refuah shlemah from any harm caused by Meir Dascalowitz.

I have been using the internet to write about the importance of supporting your family and I will keep on doing that.


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106. Thank You!     3/4/11 - 2:00 PM
Rachel Federman - Brooklyn, NY

Thank you for leading the way in our communities progress to protect our community's children by reporting the perpetrators. The effects of your actions will continue to grow as your courage is contagious.


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107. Rabbi Horowitz steps up to the plate     3/4/11 - 3:32 PM
D Lichtenstein - Monsey NY

The silent majority is fully with you on this. Keep up the good work.


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108. Thank You Rabbi Horowitz     3/4/11 - 5:40 PM
Shlomo Goldberg - Los Angeles, CA - shlogold@gmail.com

For your continued dedication to the children of the Clal Yisroel


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109. Thank you for your bravery     3/4/11 - 6:49 PM
Rivka - Los Angeles

Because you came forward, others will not suffer.

May you and your family find strength and healing from Hakadosh Baruch Hu, and may the day soon come when klal Yisrael speaks with one voice AGAINST those who would take advantage of those they should have been protecting.


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110. You are so brave     3/4/11 - 7:55 PM
Jennifer Sieger - Los Angeles, CA

You are so brave for standing up to this person that has assaulted you. It is not your fault! IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT! Please remember that over the years and please make sure to get help to process what has happened to you. You are the victim, but by prosecuting this person you are taking your power back. Kol hakavod! My prayers are with you.


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111. To victims and their families:     3/5/11 - 6:27 PM
judith - Israel

I completely agree with and support your willingness to tell your story and pursue prosecution of the offender. You did nothing wrong and did not ask to be attacked. Don't let anyone convince you otherwise. Your courage deserves the utmost respect. May Hsshem send you refuah and give you the strength to see this case through to the end.


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112. Yeyasher Kochacha     3/5/11 - 10:31 PM
Yisroel - New York, NY

Perhaps if more victims took such action, as difficult as it may be, it will make potential perpertrators think twice before engaging in such disgusting behavior.


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113. Thank you.     3/5/11 - 11:55 PM
Yossi Schwimmer - Monsey, NY

Thank you for your important work, especially since you could've just been quiet like (almost) everyone else of your caliber.


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114. gam zeh yaavor     3/6/11 - 12:14 AM
Razie - Lakewood, NJ

bear in mind that by getting this creep off the street you are stopping him from ruining more lives, and also preventing his potential victims from victimizing others...and so on. SO your bravery matters.


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115. Thank you!!!     3/6/11 - 1:00 AM
Wolf Family - NY

We too want to show our support for you and all victims and daven that you should be blessed with strength and hatzlocho in moving on with a healthy, happy life.

We also wish to say a huge thank you for coming foward and reporting and doing your best to get this molester off the streets and far from where he can continue to hurt others!


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116. Chazak V'ametz     3/6/11 - 1:37 AM
Suri

I shed copious tears when reading about, and listening to (the father of the victim) your family recounting the horrific details of this monstrous attack on the innocent child of yours.

I salute you, and am inspired by the courage, to swim against the tide. For standing up, and when others push you down, you stand up and keep firm. Hashem is on your side. No matter how it plays out in this world, the perpetrator will be made to pay. And you will get schar for doing what you are supposed to be doing, protecting and standing up for your child. In addition, you are preventing who knows how many other innoncents from being abused by this perpetrator - as well as making other molestors think long and hard before attempting abuse.

Chazak V'ametz! We stand with you and support you.


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117.     3/6/11 - 1:59 AM
Chavi S - Brooklyn, NY

We are here to support you!


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118. Keep up the good work     3/6/11 - 4:26 AM
Sora - Yerushalayim


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119. we are with you!     3/6/11 - 6:26 AM
fellow survivor - Europe

I want to applaud you for your courage! As a fellow survivor I feel for you and wishing you lots of strength! Know that you are doing the right thing! Chazak veamatz!


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120. Thank you for your brave efforts!     3/6/11 - 9:55 AM
Dina Bacharach - Jerusalem, Israel - ddbacharach@gmail.com

We support you!


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121. You have our support!!!     3/6/11 - 11:55 AM
Gitty Stroh - Brklyn, NY

May Hashem bless you with complete menuchas hanefesh! Hatzlacha in standing up to the monster who has hurt you so. You are not alone.


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122. we are with you!     3/6/11 - 12:19 PM
Leibish Heller - London

teiere yidishe kinder: we are with you!


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123. We are with you     3/6/11 - 12:26 PM
Ariel Cohen - New York

Dear victims and families, what you are doing is right and just! what these monsters have perpetrated should not be swept under the rug. You should have koach to move through this ordeal and know that the frum community is behind you.


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124. May Hashem bentch your terrific work!     3/6/11 - 12:52 PM
M. Breitman - Los Angeles


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125.     3/6/11 - 6:38 PM
Anonymous

I fully support your honest comments and the simple truth that we must show our children that we love them and support them. Our children should never feel like they are bad, and or ch"sh that H' doesn't love them. We can't be afraid to help prosecute the child molesters that live between us, its the only way to deter them and also show our children we really stand behind them and are proud of and love them


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126. Our thoughts     3/6/11 - 9:32 PM
Chumi Friedman - Brooklyn/NY

B'Makon sh'ayn eesh - In a place where no man dares to stand, thank you Rabbi Horowitz for standing for all of us. To those of you who have suffered, know that you are in our tefillos. May Hakadosh Baruch Hu heal you His light and may our community find the strength to overcome the evil will have allowed in our midst.


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127. Please Write Full Name!     3/6/11 - 11:10 PM
Pay Attention!

Ed. note: THIS IS NOT AN OFFICIAL COMMENT. IT WAS POSTED BY A READER.

Please sign your full name, not just "Yossi". 2. Address your support to the victims, not to Rabbi Horowitz.

If you read the article, and Rabbi Horowitz's comment on it, you will see that he requests that you write your full name, and that you address your letter to the victims, NOT to Rabbi Horowitz.

Thank you.

P.S. I have posted my own letter, using my full name, without mentioning Rabbi Horowitz.


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128. Chazak V'ematz     3/6/11 - 11:43 PM
Liora - Memphis TN

You may have been a victim in the past, but that does not have to define the rest of your life. Remember that we say every day in davening that Hashem is "HaRofeh l'shevurei lev, u'mechabesh l'atzvosam"--Hashem heals the brokenhearted and binds up their sorrows. Those who tormented you have committed the worst kind of chilul Hashem, but you are being mekadesh His name by publicly declaring that such acts are despicable to Hashem. In the zechus of your courage, may Hashem grant you personal yeshuos from all of your pain and suffering, as well as a yeshuah for all of K'lal Yisrael.


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129. Victims of this terrible crime: we are with you.     3/7/11 - 2:51 AM
Dick Kleiman - Har Nof - Dick.kleiman@gmail.com

Beloved ones, this evil that was forced on you, combined with threats that burdened you with fear at such a young age, is not the only way. Your parents, teachers, neghbors, and friends care about you, love you, and only want the best for you. Speak to them - we won't curse you, or deny your suffering. On the contrary, when we find out about such wicked people, we would destroy them, or at least put them where it is impossible for them to cause more harm.

You are the righteous ones, the precious ones. Chazak v'ametz liebecha. We will destroy this evil! (referred by Yitschak Adlerstein on Cross-Currents)


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130.     3/7/11 - 10:00 AM
Chaya - Lakewood, NJ

My Tefillos are with the victim and family. May you feel the support of the frum community and hold your heads high. May Hashem help you to recover and have joy in your lives. Bringing a predator to justice is the only way to address this issue in our community. Hashem should protect all of our children.


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131. Kol Hakavod R' Horowitz     3/7/11 - 11:27 AM
Daniel - Cleveland Heights, OH

May Hashem give you hatzlocho in your fight against abuse.

Shame on those who'll come to court to support the abuser.


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132. Chazak v'Ematz!     3/7/11 - 12:48 PM
Mosheh Wolfish - Baltimore, MD

To R' Horowitz - Yasher Koach. ma Hu Ozer Dalim, af ata ozer dalim!

To the victims - please accept my apologies for having participated many years ago in a chutzpadik sham! A noted Baltimore rabbi was suffering from advanced ALS and, per the suggestion of someone, considered that he was being punished for having slighted a great talmid chacham. He assembled a minyan (I was one of them) to go the kever of that t"ch and tearfully asked mechila. Many years later, this rabbi was posthumously revealed to have been a serial molester having victimized HUNDREDS (or more). I am embarrassed for having been used to maintain such a false, eidele image.


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133. Thank you for doing this!     3/7/11 - 1:04 PM
Goldy Rosenberg - Brooklyn, NY

To make sure "Va'haya Machanecha Kadosh", we have to stand behind those who are cleaning up our community, abuser by abuser. To the victims, abuse was done to you and does not define you. You are precious and loved. And respected for having the strength to survive.


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134. Well said Rabbi Horowitz.     3/7/11 - 1:30 PM
Yair Elnadav


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135. We may be "quiet" but we are there with you and support you 100%     3/7/11 - 1:37 PM
Mordy Wiener - Brooklyn, NY

I know it must be frustrating to feel like no one is there for you and no one supports you but the main reason is because people don't know how to stand up and say "we are with you"! With this article, Rabbi Horowitz finally gave many people the place to finally stand up and tell there victim "we support you". Thank you Rabbi Horowitz.

Can I suggest that Rabbi Horowitz starts a movement of getting the leading Rabbis of all of our communities to stand up and state publicly that #1 they support the victims and #2 that everyone must do everything possible to lock up the molesters? It's time for this to happen.


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136. Chazak!     3/7/11 - 2:23 PM
Moshe Zev Weisberg - Lakewood, NJ - weisbergmz@yahoo.com

Thank you for standing up publicly and for trying to create a real grass roots movement to change long-entrenched (mostly anti-Torah) attitudes, and more importantly, for standing with our precious and pure children who-have had their childhood and innocence violently ripped from them.

May you and those who stand with you be Gebentched!


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137. Stay Strong     3/7/11 - 3:50 PM
Miriam Rosenberg - Monsey, NY

Dear Family,

Please stay strong. Stay strong in the face of those who refuse to acknowledge the truth of what happened. Stay strong against those who will attack you. Stay strong if your story is ignored by the Jewish Media while pedophiles and abuser receive "Rabbinic" support and articles written BLIND to the truth.

And stay strong and remember not to judge the Torah by those who claim to represent it.


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138.     3/7/11 - 6:24 PM
Boruch

I barely almost never write comments.But this article is really touching me very deeply.Rabbi Yakow Horowitz I never met you. But what I'm reading is impossible to describe in words how much holy and lost neshamos you're elevating.You should get credit what you're doing.And the whole Jewish community should support you holy work.A lot of people are saying why go to court,he's a Jew....I always answer them what if this chas veshalom happens with them? What are they going to do.People don't know how much suffering is involved.Rabbi Yakov Horowitz you're a very courageous Rabbi to have the guts to do it so openly.


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139. True Heroes     3/7/11 - 8:24 PM
steve - Brooklyn, NY

To the Survivor and his family,

May Hashem give you the strength to persevere during these difficult times. Based on this small sample of the outpouring of support on this blog, you can see that the overwhelming majority of Klal Yisroel are on your side. More importantly, Hashem is with you as you are Mekadesh Sheim Shamayim Barabim! You are heroes in every sense of the word as your actions are sending a clear message to the child molesters and their enablers that their reign of terror is coming to an end. Your reward in this world and the world to come is immeasurable.

In the end, Emes and Torah true values will win out over the malchus harisha that has been in control. Don't give in to these enablers who attack innocent victims in the name of "Daas Torah". They have absolutely no Daas and they are certainly not following our Torah.

Please make sure to see this through to the end and don't give in to the coercion attempts of your community and the DA's office. May we all continue to work together to protect our children and in your zchus and the zchusim of other survivors, may we see an end to this plague once and for all, Amen!


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140. Thank you for your courage!     3/7/11 - 10:46 PM
Miriam Lefkowitz - Brooklyn, NY

To The Victims and Their Families, Thank you for your strength and courage! I can only imagine how much strength you must have to do what's right and nonetheless how difficult it must be. I pray that Hashem continues giving you strength and courage, and that the monster gets what he deserves! Chazak V'ematz!


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141. To the victims     3/7/11 - 11:15 PM
Daniel Rubin - Baltimore - abba21209@yahoo.com

It is with deep pain and disappointment that all I can offer to your indescribable suffering is a few words of empathy or encouragement. There is no way I can imagine what you are going through and there should be no length to which Torah Jewry should not go to support and defend you. May you merit seeing indescribable happiness in place of your pain and Hashem's swift justice against your tormentors.


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142. We are with you!     3/7/11 - 11:26 PM
Dr. Rubin - Baltimore, MD

Our thoughts are with you. You have our support through this difficult time and hope you can grow up knowing that none of this is your fault. The evil perpetrated by these abusers can only be addressed by Hashem. May Hashem give you the strength to overcome this and move on with your lives.


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143. You are no longer a victim, you are a fighter!     3/8/11 - 1:03 AM
Tamar Fischer - Brooklyn, NY

There are probably no adequate words that can be used to express the pain that you have suffered. But know, that Klal Yisroel is with you! Your courage and fortitude in bringing this monster, this rodef, to justice is inspiring. You give hope to everyone.

Our Tefillos are with you. May H-shem fortify you and continue to give you the courage necessary and may you be blessed with healing, bracha and hatzlacha. Chazak V'ematz!


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144.     3/8/11 - 1:43 AM
Perry Dubinsky - Monsey NY - pdubinsky@pcuniverse.com

As we head into the new month may we see the yad Hashem as we davened today this should be sof v'keitz lchol tzoroseinu.


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145. A thank you to the victims     3/8/11 - 2:33 AM
Lisa Hershman - Jerusalem, Israel - lhershma@gmail.com

I write to encourage your valiant efforts and great contribution to quashing abuse in our community. You have sacrificed your privacy and anonymity, exposing what others may have chosen to hide from public view, for the greater good of the community. All members of our community ought to thank you and daven that Hashem heal you and give to you the strength to continue living b'simcha.


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146. Torah rules not the Yetzer Horah We are with you     3/8/11 - 8:16 AM
Chaya Perl - Brooklyn NY

As a relative to three molestation victims this post gives me great chizuk to have something to show them for their pain and that their voices are finally being heard. Keep up the great work on behalf of Klal Yisroel.


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147. one small voice can become a huge echo thankyou     3/8/11 - 2:54 PM
Ruth S. Levi - Suffern, New York

The mirror you hold up, for us to look at ourselves, must be very heavy for you. Thank you for your great strength. You unabashedly point a finger at the "Rodef" and tell us "Al Tamode B'dam Raiecho.


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148. community responsibility to the victims     3/8/11 - 11:30 PM
Sharon Feifer - Efrat , Israel - sfeifer@gmail.com

I stand with and support the victims and their families. I am terribly sorry for all of your suffering. I hope you know that you are not alone. Those who abuse our innocent children should be reported and punished. They have damaged the entire community. The community is obligated to protect children and not those who abuse them. The community is obligated to admit the extent of abuse and demand change. The community is obligated to educate parents and children, prevent abuse and encourage those who have been abused to report it to the proper authorities. We should all feel shame to be part of a religious community that has for too long kept quiet and protected abusers instead of victims. Kol Hakavod to all victims and their families who have the courage to tell the truth in Public. To them and to all the others who have suffered silently may Hashem continue to give you Koach.


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149. Thank You!     3/9/11 - 1:51 AM
S. - Menzer

Thank you for being a voice for all victims. This is not easy work, efforts on behalf of the Klal is greatly appreciated!


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150. Yasher Koach Rabbi Horowitz!     3/9/11 - 6:06 PM
Josh Ruben - Chicago, IL - joshuaruben@yahoo.com


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151.     3/9/11 - 11:24 PM
Asher Lipner, Ph.D. - lipnera@gmail.com

Let's ALL Join Rabbi Horowitz Rabbi Adlerstien's article written in support of Rabbi Horowitz's call to action for the community to support the victims of child molestation against their alleged perpetrators is a refreshing and welcome change of attitude coming from the Haredi Cross Currents Internet blog. Survivors of abuse and children's advocates look forward to welcoming Rabbi Horowitz and his supporters on March 26th at the courthouse, so we can all come together to fulfill the mitzvah of "Lo Sa'amod Al Dam Reyecha," not standing idly by the blood of your neighbor.

However, with success come further challenges. Now that the community has achieved the accomplishment of getting two prominent Charedi rabbis affiliated with Agudas Yisroel openly supporting advocating for victims to prosecute their abusers, we now have an historic opportunity to make a real push to stop both the abuse of children and the intimidation of victims.

Rabbi Yaakov Perlow, the Novominsker Rebbe and the Nasi of the Moetzes Gedolei Yisroel of the Agudah, has been personally supportive and helpful of several victims' families, and has encouraged them quietly to report the heinous crimes to the authorities. In the current case the compliant family has now suffered the tortures of hell perpetrated on them by an angry community that has mounted the usual powerful campaign of intimidation and vindictiveness against the young victim and his family. These heroic Jewish parents, standing up for the safety and dignity of their develpmentally delayed son desperately need our Gedolim to publicly show their support for the victim and to put a "ban" with a “kol koreh” against people attacking victims of abuse who report to the authorities. If the Rebbe, Shlit"a together with other Gedolim would publicize their support for the victim and his family, the amount of healing it would bring both this family as well as countless other victims who are suffering in silence, afraid to speak out about what happened to them, would be incalculable.

After all, in the Torah, when a Jew is murdered it is Ziknei Ha'ir, the Gedolei Hador, who are obligated to represent the community in the Mitzvah of Egla Arufa and to proclaim 'Yadeinu Lo Shafchu Es Hadam Hazeh' - Our hands have not spilled this blood." Standing together will send a strong message to the judge, the victim and the relatives, and all child molesters that the blood of Yiddishe kinder is not cheap.

For those who question the comparison between child molestation and murder, I have encountered several survivors of child sexual abuse whose pain is so chronic and so great that they feel that it would have been better to have been murdered. Indeed, it has been shown in many studies that there is a significantly higher incidence of suicide in this group of people. It is for this reason that Gedolei Haposkim including Rav Elyashav have paskened that when one knows or even has "Raglyaim Ladavar - reason to suspect" that a molestation has taken place, one has an obligation to report it to the authorities.

Anecdotally, Oprah Winfrey once asked an incarcerated molester about his regrets. He replied with conviction "I killed the person she could have been". That is what molesters do. They kill off the ability for a neshomo to reach its potential as it continues to be racked with trauma and confusion, often struggling with its emunah, and the question of "How could a frum person have done this to me?"

Unfortunately, survivors of abuse were horrified that even after a courageous daughter from a Heimish family successfully prosecuted and won a conviction against her father who abused her for years, there were still several rabbis who put her through more pain and suffering by signing a "kol koreh" calling her father a tzadik and defaming her character. No Charedi rabbis publicly came to her defense. A respected Rov in Lakewood reported his son's molestation to the authorities, and the community retaliated so harshly that the family was forced to move out of town. Again, there was no protest in support of the victim. Another woman in Lakewood, whose son died from a drug overdose after being severely abused by a molester as a child, had her house burned down when she publicized her son's story after his Petirah. And once again, the family suffers alone with no public rabbinic support.

My professional clinical psychology practice includes many children, adolescents and adults who are suffering from the painful effects of being molested as children and having no safe place to express their pain in the community. Studies show that for a victim of abuse, having community support in confronting their abusers can be very healing for symptoms of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.

I would like to respectfully ask Rabbis Horowitz and Adlerstein to join the survivors and all child advocates in beseeching our Gedolim to offer strong public support to the victims of abuse in our community who prosecute their abusers in the spirit of being like Hashem who is "Mevakesh Es Hanirdaf". Hashem advocates for victims.


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152. In Strong Support of the Victims     3/10/11 - 5:33 PM
Lana Schechter - Boro Park

May we rid our community of these terrible crimes and stand together to heal the victims. Love to all the survivors. We are behind you!!


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153. Amalek     3/15/11 - 8:54 PM
Ellen Lebowicz - Brooklyn, NY

It's difficult to admit that the fear of the community to protect you superceded the courage it took you to step forward and risk not being heard. May our internal members of Amalek be brought to justice and may you courageous souls, the Mordechais and Esthers of our community, be able to celebrate saving your own, and the others who have not yet revealed themselves, new and joyful lives.


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154. It is time to do some real Pesach cleaning, and start cleaning what has been swept under the rug!!!     3/19/11 - 11:32 PM
Leah Preiserowicz - Brooklyn, NY - lpreiserowicz@yahoo.com

Dear victim and family:

My heart goes out to how you have sufferred. I would like to say that I admire your bringing public and prosecuting the predator that has hurt you so. I know it is hard to go public, but you are preventing untold children from having to suffer. I encourage family members and friends of predators to turn in, rather than protect these monsters among us. I think it is time for the entire community to publicize and name names and let these people know they are not welcome in our homes, schools, shuls or communities.


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155.     3/20/11 - 3:17 AM
Rochie Korolitzky - NY

Thank you for speaking out against a "touchy" topic that few have the courage to speak up about. The victims should know that whatever happened to them is not their fault and they have lots of supporters on their side.


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156. We hear and support     3/21/11 - 12:24 PM
Lea Weiss - Lawrence, NY - amyisroelchai1818@yahoo.com

For those who have felt as though the community has failed them - we stand with you, and support you, and will not remain deaf to the situation. We can no longer be squeamish about issues that cause irreparable damage to our children, our next generation.


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157. Giving Chizuk     3/23/11 - 4:14 PM
Yasher Koach/SupportTheSurvivors.org - yasherkoach613@gmail.com

I think I speak for almost all survivors who have ever felt that the frum community had forgotten about us and weren't interested in our plight - and even worse, made us feel re-victimized - THANK YOU for all of the support you have shown here.

I implore you not to forget the survivors of sexual abuse in our community after Friday's hearings. While it's amazing that so much publicity surrounds the Weberman and Dascalowitz court appearances, there are ongoing opportunities to provide support and chizuk to survivors as well.


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158.     3/24/11 - 2:53 AM
Anonymous

Yashar koach to you, Rabbi Horowitz, and to everyone who is supporting the victim and his family at this difficult time.

To the victim, AMUSH: Know that you are a wonderful human being with a special neshama. The horrors that others have inflicted and continue to inflict upon you are disgusting acts of inhumanity, but they do not change the fact that you yourself are incredibly precious. Your suffering is not your fault. Klal Yisrael and the entire thinking world stands behind you. We know that you are legitimately in pain- that you are not making things up. You deserve to be heard, and we all hear your voice. Keep strong.


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159. Update: Court Schedule for Fri. 3-25-10 For the Dascalowitz Weberman Hearings     3/24/11 - 10:10 AM
Admin@rabbihorowitz.com

Date: Friday March 25th, 2010

Time: 9:00 a.m. (come 20 minutes earlier for security checks, and one hour before to be sure of a seat). Be ready to wait, and wait, and wait till the case is called up. But pay close attention. Some supporters who took the effort to attend the previous Weberman appearance missed it because it was over before 10 a.m.

Place: Kings County Supreme Court, 320 Jay Street (corner Johnson St), Brooklyn, NY 11201 (parking at Marriott)

Court Rooms: Check and write down the room listings in the court lobby for:

* Nechemya Weberman (before Judge Patricia DiMango)

* Meir Dascalowitz (Before Judge Miriam Cyrulnik)

Thanks to Yerachmiel Lopin for providing this information.


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160.     3/24/11 - 7:59 PM
Anonymous

why don't you address the issue of mesirah - are you so sure that hamoser yehudi byat nuchri .. does not apply


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161. Response to Anonymous #160     3/27/11 - 3:18 AM
Yoily Weiss - Brooklyn, NY - annoyingpopups@gmail.com

Are you worried about Mesira? Harav Hagaon R' Elyashiv Shlita is not. To see the PDF of the R' Elyashiv's tshuva, visit this link.

https://docs.google.com/viewer?a=v&pid=explorer&chrome=true&srcid=0B3zu9hDuGtR9MzNlMGNhYWItNDM3My00ZDgxLTkzNGItYWVhZTM4NDhiMTgz&hl=en


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162. Kol Hakavod     3/27/11 - 8:14 AM
Malki Hockman - Jerusalem

You should have a lot of Siyatta Dishmaya with everything.


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163. We stand with you     3/30/11 - 10:34 PM
Rikki Berk - New York, NY

And we wait for the day when H-shem will heal all wounds


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164. important     4/14/11 - 8:58 PM
Anonymous

Rabbi, All child advocates are being placed in a position of discomfort, due to the Kellner situation. Please write a piece on false accusations, and dealing with them. Thanks


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165. Yasher Koach     5/30/12 - 11:00 PM
Dorfman Family - La, CA

To the victim and family, Yasher Koachem to you for the immense courage you are displaying. If we lived on the east coast, we would attend the hearing in your support. Thank you for your bravery and strength. You are in our thoughts. the dorfman family, los angeles


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166. victim or complainant     9/11/13 - 7:33 AM
dovid

is not complainant a fairer term to use than victim

We prefer to us the word “Complainant” rather than the word “Victim” as this word insinuates the allegation happened

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